Grateful Until The Last Trumpet [Podcast]
April 26, 2021
The Shocking News At The Final Throne | PODCAST
April 29, 2021
Broken | The Secret Of Insecurity
By Pastor Vinnie
Stain Glass From Ascension Episcopal Church
I Am Broken.
Who told you that brokenness was something you had to hide?
The greatest weakness any human being can partake in is the weakness of being fearful and ashamed of their own brokenness. The “strong man” persona is the root of all foolishness and frankly a den of inner demons. We pretend to be strong because, like the cavemen we sometimes act like, we think our beating of the chest and phony posturing of power will scare away our adversaries and trick people into thinking we are awesome and fearful.
It is important to recognize that, when you see someone over-projecting strength, you are not seeing someone who is healthy or confident, but actually fearful and living in constant insecurity. It is a hell of its own making; a never-ending, never resting, sense of danger that the captive is unable to see or accept that they are trapped in. It breeds insecurity because anything or anyone who points out any weakness becomes the threat that could expose the real inner being. Real confidence and real security only ever comes when we have assessed our real brokenness and seek out a healer. When I know my weakness, when I accept my brokenness, when I come to terms with my demons, count them and record the inventory, only then do I understand what I am being healed from.
This is exactly why the Apostle Paul wrote, “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” (1 Corinthians 1:18)
Ouch! Right? Did you get it? The message of the Cross is foolishness to those who are perishing because they have failed to do a self-assessment and come to terms with the reality of their utter brokenness. They have taken the spiritual position of “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it,” to their soul! But the tragic problem is it is broken, and the Cross is the only cure!
It does not take a religious practitioner or a moralist to understand that humans are incomplete and broken creatures. It is the building block of humanist psychology, most branches of philosophy, not to mention everyday common sense. The motto “nobody is perfect” is commonplace in our vernacular for a reason; it is a universal understanding that something is broken, incomplete, and unfinished in all humanity. To be human is to be as the ancient Hebrew prophet once put it, to be not quite completed or fastened, “Woe is me! for I am undone” (Isaiah 6:5). I think “undone” is a good word in thinking about this problem. It is not that I am not gifted, or that there are not great things about me, and awesome strengths I use to compensate for being incomplete. In fact, the opposite is true almost to our own detriment. We are a little too good at compensating and hiding our weaknesses and never letting people see who we really are.
Shame is the beast the feeds our existing brokenness and makes many go from bad to absurd. Because we are broken, undone, imperfect, we seek to cover that brokenness with compensation, talent, and rigorous hard work. Why? Shame. I don’t want you to see me as I really am. People who overcompensate, seek to project stronger than they really are, and see themselves as needing to be in control; often are people suffering internally with high levels of shame. They are embarrassed about who they really are and maybe even fear that they would be unloved, or unwanted if you saw them as they really are. The tragedy here is that these people can never experience the fullness of intimacy that could aid them in healing. I can’t be truly intimate on a deep level with another person who I am fearful to show my real self as I really am. This affects every corner of our lives from love, family, friendship, and even our professional level relationships. Wisdom and hurtful experiences reinforce in us the need to use caution with whom we share our brokenness, and to what level we share it. But to never share, or worse yet never come to terms with it, traps us into low-level relationships devoid of meaning and real acceptance. In short, it leads to an unfulfilled life and the inability to build the kinds of emotional bonds that heal ourselves and others.
Stain Glass From Ascension Episcopal Church
It is not accidental that Moses, in telling the story of the fall in Genesis 3 shows a transactional cascade of shame, fear, and then blame, between Adam and Eve, rather than guilt and acceptance of sin.
“At that moment [of their sin] their eyes were opened, and they suddenly felt shame at their nakedness. So they sewed fig leaves together to cover themselves. When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man and his wife heard the Lord God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the Lord God among the trees. Then the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?” He replied, “I heard you walking in the garden, so I hid. I was afraid because I was naked.” “Who told you that you were naked?” the Lord God asked. “Have you eaten from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat?” The man replied, “It was the woman you gave me who gave me the fruit, and I ate it.” Then the Lord God asked the woman, “What have you done?” “The serpent deceived me,” she replied. “That’s why I ate it.” (Genesis 3:7-13)
Notice, their shame led them to hide from God, then blame each other, blame creation, and ultimately blame God (who created) rather than just admit they needed to be helped to heal. Lack of trust in God is a key reason we can’t admit our brokenness. When we don’t admit our brokenness to our self, our God, and our loved ones, how then can we get their help? Rather than get help, find healing, and make progress, you end up hiding, living life in fear pretending to be strong, and eventually becoming bitter and blaming everyone else for your failures. At the end of the day rejecting your own broken state of being is really closing the door to Jesus, telling him you got it all covered with the leaves, and your will map out your own redemption because that is less painful than admitting to God and others just how unfinished you are.
The purpose of relationships is to heal. Because we are all broken and incomplete we need each other. We need insight and need to seek betterment together. This is why the Bible says, “Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counselors there is safety” (Proverbs 11:14). We are all broken pieces of God’s stained-glass image of humanity. We only make sense of that image when we stop focusing on the defects of one piece and pull back and look at the whole image that the creator is restoring. Jesus is healing you by putting you on a mosaic of others who are also broken but broken in a way the helps you, affirms you, and gives you a real opportunity to be a healing factor in others too.
Stain Glass From Ascension Episcopal Church
I remember I was in the second year of my Social Work program and I went to see Jane Gordon, who was not only one of my professors but had become a life mentor to me. The therapeutic bond was both warm yet professional between us. She listened quietly to me as I ranted on and on about some young adult existential drama in my life at the time. She was affirming, yet let me share openly my brokenness without judgment. When it was all over she simply said, “Vince, you’re the exactly broken kid I knew you were the day you shuffled into my class, unprepared, disorganized, fearful, full of doubt, yet still ready to change the world. The only difference is, now you know it too. And that is the greatest thing that can happen to any of us. You’re gonna be ok. You’re going to be better than ok. You’re going to do great things, and help lots of people. Just promise me this one thing. When you do, don’t go fixing every part of you that you think needs to be fixed. It is the neurosis [perceived brokenness] in you that really makes you amazing and interesting. I know you hate those things about you, but the rest of us are rather fond of your quirks. Go change the world, just don’t think you are the world that always needs to be fixed.”
Perhaps you think Dr. Gordon was just spouting off Carl Rodgers style psychobabble, but she was not. She was speaking a universal truth. Shame amplifies in us the perceived brokenness [neurosis] we all live with. Some of it needs to change, in order to help us achieve personal growth, and part of it is broken just enough to help others. What stays and what changes is up to God as He seeks to restore in you His redemptive glory. God, as the only one not broken, is the only one who can really be objective. Make no mistake the way He declares that to us is by the reflective intimacy we have in honest relationships with each other.
Stop hiding who you are. Stop hiding how you are broken. Start showing others that the road to healing, health, and redemption is through honest, powerful relationships which reflect God working in us, just as we are. Be broken but stop the shame.
That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:10)
Related Podcast Episode:
Follow Me On Tik Tok
Join my Facebook to find more
spiritual growth resources!
It is all about seeking Jesus on deeper theological levels.
SIMPLY DEVOTION PODCAST ON DEMAND
